Strange Dreams and Inexplicable Phenomena

by Daniel
(ohio)

Greetings,

I am not sure if this counts as paranormal phenomena or not, as it mostly centers around a recurring theme in the dream state, imaginary friends, and one verifiable inexplicable phenomenon involving low light vision cameras, but here goes:

I have had a recurring dream now since I was a young boy (around the age of 5 or 6). It is actually a progression of dreams that take off, in a sense, where the previous one left off. The connection between dreams is that they seem to be in a parallel universe that very closely resembles the everyday waking world, but everything is darker and seems to be faintly backlit by a faintly glowing darkness - that is, oddly enough, light. (Not all of my dreams are in this setting, just the big ones.)

The first one was where a pebble would fall into my mouth and grow and grow and grow until my head would nearly explode. I would be in a pit and trying to climb out, but as I got closer to escaping the pit would enlarge. I had this dream repeatedly for nearly three months. It is interesting to note that I had a stutter during this time. This dream was the worst nightmare that I ever had as I felt powerless. During this time I learned, out of sheer frustration, that I could affect changes by exerting my will.

Finally, one night, at the end of this dream period I pulverized the (by then) boulder(lol). And upon waking, I discovered that day that I never had a stutter ever again (I am now 35). I suppose that this is all explainable in a mundane manner.

During this time period, up til the end of this dream, I had an imaginary friend(s). My mother swears that the room would be cold when I was playing with them and she felt that I was possessed. Needless to say... my mother had issues (as may I. Lol).

Anyways, they tried to have me exorcised... it ended badly. I fought my way free and located a police officer outside of the church. Child services was eventually involved and I was given out-patient counseling sessions. It was assessed that I was hyper active, had a vivid imagination, and that one of my family members was teaching me about meditation techniques, lucid dreaming and hermeticism: which I attributed to imaginary friends... and my mother attributed to demonic possession. She was mandated to counseling. Lol.

To skip to my last dream (and as clarification, I no longer have imaginary friends. They vanished, so to speak, with my stutter (which could have been from my embarrassment of my stutter and inability to socialize).

My last recurring dream involves a series of three dreams, like an initiation rite of sorts. I have been having them since 2008 and I cannot affect them as I can some of my other dreams. In the first one, I walk out of a space between worlds, of blackness and void, into a forest clearing. There is a fire. Surrounded by three rings of rocks. Huddled around the three rings of rocks are four creature, like goblins. Each one is a solid color representing one of the four elements. I converse with them in an unintelligible language and come to the realization that they want me to stand within the fire (representing spirit).

It.feels.warm.and.welcoming. I do so and I am immediately in the middle of a black roiling ocean. I feel little and insignificant. Terrified, but hiding it. All around me is darkness. Lightning and thunder backlit with what appears to be red darkness intermittently light up the world around me as a whale surfaces about three feet in front of me. The fleshy (because that is what it feels like) disk wobbles and I am momentarily terrified that I will fall into the darkness of the sea - which I realize is blood.

The immediately identifier that the whale is something else can be seen by the writhing tentacles where its mouth should be. It is angled slightly so that its giant eye is looking at me. Seeing all that I am and ever will be (I am immediately reminded of the similarities of H.P. Lovecraft's Cuthulu). I hear an otherworldly whale song. It is asking me a question, and I feel as if I am on the brink of madness because it isn't in words but a series of conflicting images that make no sense. I think of lying to it/her but know that it would know that I was lying.

I respond and I am immediately in a weird twilight-like world where it is both night and day at the same time. There is a maze that I am in and I am trying to catch up to a woman. There are intersecting points and stairways leading to nowhere and everywhere. I am always the same distance from her no matter how fast I run. She finally stops running and is on a dais, like a queen. She seems motherly and sad. On one of the platforms leading past her is a knife. I traverse the stairs and pick it up. She beckons me to do what needs to be done, but that I can never return once I do so - which is where her sadness comes from. I leave her. I calmly plunge the knife through my left hand to the hilt. It looks like a marine style k-bar combat knife with the exception of the silver skull with black tarnished eyes. Blood begins pouring from my hand and is immediately morphed in to a whirling tunnel composed of blood and souls of the people before me that have traveled this very same path. I am reminded of my insignificance when viewed from the macrocosm.

At the end of the tunnel is a door that is circular in design and spirals open. A man strides to me and stops roughly a foot from me. He has black eyes. I don't sense any malevolence. I distinctly sense nothing whatsoever emotionally. He looks as I do with the exception of the way he is dressed (like nobility) and he has his hair drawn back in a ponytail (and of course his eyes). He explains many things to me, but most notably, is that he wishes for me to cross the threshold of the door behind him so that I may become as I was meant to become. He goes on to explain that I am lost and he is only offering this option for a limited time. If I take too long, then he would hasten the process of my becoming him in a process similar to possession but not... because I am him so it wouldn't be stealing.

I have as of yet never crossed that final threshold... but I know that I am suppose to so that I can remember everything (an infinite amount of lifetimes of experiences).

This, in and of itself, doesn't seem paranormal, but recently I installed low lightvision cameras. When I am in front of them my eyes seem completely black with fields of darkness emanating from them. I initially attributed this to the infrared diodes that allow the camera to see in darkness. My fiancee was creeped out by it though and said that it was not right. So we experimented. She stood by me and the same thing was not present for her, nor my children. She is creeped out by it. I, on the other hand, see it as more of a fascinating curiosity.

I was wondering now though, in the absence of a scientific explanation (that I can discern), if anyone could give me an explanation of sorts spiritually. I am Asatruar which for the sake of identification we will call Odinism. I don't believe in demons - as the word is of Greek origin and means traveler between worlds (basically). I am just hoping for further insight if possible.

Thank you,
Daniel