Say My Name

by Philip

Growing up my family has switched religions a few times. When I was born my parents were devout Catholics. Around the age of 10 my family switched churches to a Christian one in hopes of receiving more moral support for the hard times we were experiencing. And most recently, around the time I turned 17 I made the decision to leave the church all together and started practicing Wicca. But ever since I've started I've been having odd occurrences, that despite all of my research, defy explanation.

Sometimes I'll feel a strange presence, or feel what someone near me feels or see what someone is thinking to a very limited degree. Now I'm not claiming to be something special or something I'm not and I'm not trying to say that these are all supernatural occurrences, it could be my subconscious picking up on social cues that my conscious mind is missing.

The thing that bothers me the most is also the thing that I should be the happiest about. See when I was younger I always had my father's temper. I was incredibly quick to anger and when I was pissed I was violent. Simple wrestling matches ended with me needing to be restrained before I truly hurt someone. I was truly a monstrous child. But after I converted to Wicca that all changed. Not because of something I did or anything but because whenever I get even mildly upset I hear someone say my name. The way they say it is always patient but stern, as if to tell me to cut the shit. And it's never the same voice twice in a row, sometimes it's a woman sometimes it's a man, sometimes it's the voice of my dead ex girlfriend and sometimes it's my mom or brother or best friend. It's always different.

I'm not really sure if it's a higher power or a powerful group of people with resources I can't understand or just my mind playing tricks on me, but what I do know is that whenever I get mad I'll hear my name and the negative emotions and thoughts will leave me.